The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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