what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I am available for nakedness
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
