we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Randomize
