I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
