how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives�
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Randomize
