they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
