Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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