I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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