it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
