I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
