i think i have herpe
just one?
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
