my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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