I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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