Yo dont text me then not text me
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
