pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
There r osticjed everywhere
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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