In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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