I'm drive I can fine osifer
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
