Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
