It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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