Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I think a kid would responsible me up
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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