Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
