I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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