She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
