he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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