nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
