the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
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