Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
...so i touched it.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I intend to get homeless drunk
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
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