Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Randomize
