Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Randomize
