Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
