what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
