K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
