i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Randomize
