My first STD was from a foam party
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
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