Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
