All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
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