i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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