How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
