I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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