There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Text me some of your sweat
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
