remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
