If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
