had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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