god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Randomize
