We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
The adults are the big ones right?
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
