Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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