big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize