I just made out with a guy for $7.
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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