Umm I'm too high to move.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize