Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize